St. Louis Cardinals: Ranking the Players Weekend nicknames

ST. LOUIS, MO - AUGUST 26: Tommy Pham #28 of the St. Louis Cardinals celebrates with his teammates after hitting a two-run walk-off home run against the Tampa Bay Rays in the ninth inning at Busch Stadium on August 26, 2017 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Dilip Vishwanat/Getty Images)
ST. LOUIS, MO - AUGUST 26: Tommy Pham #28 of the St. Louis Cardinals celebrates with his teammates after hitting a two-run walk-off home run against the Tampa Bay Rays in the ninth inning at Busch Stadium on August 26, 2017 in St. Louis, Missouri. (Photo by Dilip Vishwanat/Getty Images) /
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This upcoming weekend, St. Louis Cardinals players will be able to use special nicknames for “Players Weekend.” Which nicknames are the best?

This weekend, the St. Louis Cardinals will be taking on the Colorado Rockies in Colorado. This series is important due to the fact that both teams are competing for playoff spots. This series stands out in another way as well; it is the second annual “Players Weekend” where MLB players get to wear flashy shoes and use flashy gear such as batting gloves, bats, and catchers equipment.

One of the coolest parts of “Players Weekend” is that MLB players get to have custom nicknames on the back of their jerseys, so players get to chance to show off their creativity using the name on the back of their jerseys.

Most St. Louis Cardinals players have indicated that they will take advantage of the opportunity. Tyler O’Neill, Jordan Hicks, Mike Mayers, John Gant, and Daniel Poncedeleon are rolling with their original last names. I’m sure Poncedeleon could have created something out of his last name since he has one of the coolest last names in all of baseball, but alas.

For those who ARE taking part of the fun nicknames, we are going to rank which of the nicknames are the best and which ones aren’t. There are plenty of creative nicknames, so let’s see which nicknames made the cut for the prestigious nickname rankings.

10.) Jose Martinez – “CAFE”

I like this nickname because Jose Martinez’s dad, Carlos Martinez, was a former MLB player, and his nickname was ”Cafe.” It is pretty cool that Jose took the nickname after his late father.

9.) Jedd Gyorko – “JERK-OH”

If you have ever watched the TV show “Seinfeld” you might remember a certain scene when Reilly cracked a joke about him for eating a lot of shrimp and George responded, “Oh yeah, the jerk store called, they’re running out of you.”

A lot of people on Cardinals twitter and even the Cardinals twitter profile gave Jedd Gyorko the nickname “Gyork Store”. Though “JERK-OH” isn’t a bad nickname, Gyork Store would have been a way better nickname, and maybe would have taken first place on this list.

8.) Luke Weaver – “DREAM”

Let’s do a flashback real quick. Way back in 1975, musician Gary Wright released a song named “The Dream Weaver”. The nickname caught on to Luke Weaver. Though I am kind of disappointed he could not get “Dream Weaver,” “DREAM” does the trick.

7.) Yairo Munoz – “PALITO”

When I was viewing the list and saw Yairo Munoz chose “PALITO” as his nickname, I had no clue what it meant. My Spanish teacher obviously did not do a great job teaching me. Still got an “A” somehow…

Well, back to the topic. When I went to Google Translate for the translation, it came up as “Little Stick.” I have no clue what that means, it might be a joke in the Cardinals clubhouse, but it got a laugh out of me. Though it would have been funny if his nickname was “Gyro,” like the Greek dish, “PALITO” is still a solid nickname.

6.) Kolten Wong – “THE PEBBLE”

Kolten Wong is known for his elite defense at second baseman, and could even potentially take home his first career Gold Glove award this season. Wong is also the shortest guy on the St. Louis Cardinals, standing at only 5’10”, which is maybe why he earned the nickname, “THE PEBBLE.”

5.) Bud Norris – “BUDMAN”

While Bud Norris isn’t notching up saves or playing golf, he might be in the lab trying to figure out a creative nickname for Players Weekend. In 1969, the beer company “Budweiser” created a superhero mascot called “Budman.” The mascot became popular around the nation. Budweiser even sold merchandise around it. Though this might not be the reason Norris chose “BUDMAN,” it is still a pretty cool theory.

4.) Paul DeJong – “PAULY”

Last season, Paul DeJong tried to get “Pauly D” for his nickname, but MLB declined his request. Paul DelVecchio, also known as “Pauly D” was a guy known for being on the award-winning TV show, “Jersey Shore”, which is the reason why DeJong wanted that nickname in the first place. This time, he decided to give “PAULY” a try, and MLB approved the nickname.

3.) Brett Cecil – “SQUINTS”

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Reliever Brett Cecil made his return from the DL about a week before the Players Weekend series against the Colorado Rockies after a solid rehab stint with the AAA Memphis Redbirds. That also means he gets to participate in the nickname contest.

I’m sure you have watched “The Sandlot.” It is one of the greatest baseball movies of all time. I’m sure you remember Michael “Squints” Palladorous as well. The guy with the glasses who faked drowning at the local pool to kiss his lifelong crush and lifeguard Wendy Peffercorn.

Due to the fact that Brett Cecil wears glasses, he received the nickname “SQUINTS”. This nickname also stands out to me because that was my nickname when I played high school baseball, and if you wear glasses and play baseball, chances are your nickname is “SQUINTS” as well.

2.) Harrison Bader – “TOTS”

Harrison Bader has been a favorite for St. Louis Cardinals fans this season, and it’s not hard to see why. He is one of the best defensive center fielders in the game right now and is currently making himself a strong candidate for a Gold Glove award.

Harrison Bader already has a couple of nicknames, the ladies like to call him “BAE-der”, and also “Master Bader” gets thrown around often since it rhymes with Darth Vader from the movie series “Star Wars.” He chose “TOTS” because Bader rhymes with tater, and tater goes with tater tots. Makes sense now, right?

1.) Michael Wacha – “WACHAMOLE”

Even though Michael Wacha will not be cleared to pitch for Players Weekend, it still won’t hold him back from participating in the festivities. When most people eat Mexican food, they like to eat guacamole to go with it (Personally, I’m a salsa guy. For obvious reasons.). So instead of guacamole, Wacha decided to get creative and change it to “WACHAMOLE,” and it sounds almost the same.

So, congrats to Michael Wacha on winning this year’s best Players Weekend nickname.

dark. Next. Possible September call-ups

There were plenty of creative nicknames chosen by the St. Louis Cardinals players. Which one was your favorite? Is my list just a complete lie? Leave your thoughts in the comments below. Thanks for reading!