Cardinals fan favorite gives hilariously bad take on St. Louis' ideal offseason

Every St. Louis Cardinals fan under the sun has acknowledged the need for a rebuild at this point. An aging roster that has gotten diminishing returns from its most expensive players simply isn't capable of keeping up with the National League's elite anymore.

With Sonny Gray, Willson Contreras, and Nolan Arenado all on the trade block this offseason, payroll cuts are to be expected for a franchise that wants to get younger and cheaper. Part of a rebuild is, you know, rebuilding. That means tearing things down and starting over with a new foundation.

Don't tell that to Lance Lynn. The longtime Cardinals pitcher and 2011 World Series champion gave a rather peculiar take on what the franchise's ideal offseason would look like, suggesting Chaim Bloom and the front office actually double down on the existing core.

Lance Lynn's insane offseason plan would set Cardinals back years.

In fairness to Lynn, the Cardinals aren't necessarily a bad team. The only free agent the team is set to lose is Miles Mikolas, which (sad to say) is probably going to be addition by subtraction. They finished second in the NL Central in 2024 before bottoming out with a 78-84 record this past season.

However, this is not a team on the rise. Adding payroll in the form of further expensive veterans (while holding onto the preexisting core of expensive veterans) is a one-way ticket to delaying the inevitable.

Now, $25 million is (roughly speaking) what Bo Bichette has been projected to collect in free agency this offseason. Bichette is an excellent hitter and would instantly become the best player on the roster. Is he alone enough to close the Cardinals' 19-win gap with the Brewers in the division?

The answer to that is, unfortunately, a resounding no. The Cardinals have honestly needed to rebuild since 2022, but they've held off, hoping this current core was capable of one more magical run.

That hasn't been the case, and now the Brewers, Chicago Cubs, and Cincinnati Reds have leapfrogged them in the NL Central arms race.

It's time to accept reality, move Arenado, Gray, and Contreras for prospects, and build toward a brighter future that restores the "Cardinal Way" (and perhaps a little devil magic).

Naturally, the front office likely won't be fielding too much advice from Lynn, who was a far better pitcher than he is an armchair executive.