St. Louis Cardinals: Sign Harper (not the one you think) as fallback

DENVER, CO - SEPTEMBER 30: Bryce Harper #34 of the Washington Nationals runs out a ninth inning double against the Colorado Rockies at Coors Field on September 30, 2018 in Denver, Colorado. (Photo by Dustin Bradford/Getty Images)
DENVER, CO - SEPTEMBER 30: Bryce Harper #34 of the Washington Nationals runs out a ninth inning double against the Colorado Rockies at Coors Field on September 30, 2018 in Denver, Colorado. (Photo by Dustin Bradford/Getty Images) /

Should the St. Louis Cardinals fail to connect in the Harper race, there is a fallback option laying in wait.

Fans of the St. Louis Cardinals have had quite the Friday. After a local writer said that the Cards need to go all-in for 2019 and sign Bryce Harper, an old 2012 tweet from Harper found its way to the top of many twitter feeds.

Look, we can all agree that Bryce Harper would be an outstanding addition to the St. Louis Cardinals. We can all agree that Harper would make the Cardinals unstoppable but what would happen if the birds on the bat failed to land Harper?

Recent history has shown that the Cardinals often come in second for big names and we all know that second is the first to come in last… Recent examples include David Price and Giancarlo Stanton (okay, so the Cards didn’t come in second on this example but you get the point).

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Let’s assume then that the Cardinals do not come in first in the Harper sweepstakes; what happens then?

Before diving into this, let me put this in all bold letters – this is a tongue-in-cheek post. I need to also share that I was not the one who came up with this joke– I owe this thanks to my co-editor, Trevor.

So, here it is: if the St. Louis Cardinals fail to sign Bryce Harper, they should sign Bryan Harper. Bryan Harper is the brother to Bryce and also finds himself playing in the Nationals system. Where Bryce plays the outfield, Bryan plays in the bullpen (or rather comes into games as a relief pitcher).

Bryan is the older brother to Bryce and while Bryce is looking at a large paycheck in 2019, Bryan is hoping to simply play. My words cannot do it justice, so just have a look at his career pitching numbers:

Register Pitching
2014242 Teams2 LgsA+-AAWSN301.0003.194.253901400459.15328213251512082581.3158.
2015252 Teams2 LgsAA-AAAWSN22.5002.963.353801400045.23617155190341031951.2047.
2016262 Teams2 LgsAA-AAAWSN32.6002.182.584001800645.12813115182410021791.0155.
All Levels (7 Seasons)167.6963.664.282120750015261.02271241061913452301302211481.3837.
AAA (2 seasons)Minors11.5002.843.55240800025.1181082152210031091.3036.
AA (4 seasons)Minors84.6673.183.751100440011127.11095345125821033075441.3127.

We all know that the St. Louis Cardinals need relief help and perhaps Bryan could spell that relief.

Okay, okay… probably not but if they could grab Bryan Harper and force him to wear number 34, would Cards fans feel they still got the Harper they wanted (that sentence is all Trevor and I love it)?

If Bryan won’t work then perhaps the St. Louis Cardinals should look at the Mud Hens’ hitting coach, Brian Harper. While he has no relation to Bryce, he too could come cheaply and… h3ll, if John Mabry could serve as hitting coach, maybe a Harper in the dugout would satisfy a need so prevalent among Cardinals fans.

Next. Free agents the Cards need. dark

Whether the St. Louis Cardinals go all-in on Bryce Harper, Bryan Harper, or Brian Harper, I hope they have a great 2019.